If you want to make changes in your life, one of the first challenges is to set boundaries for yourself and in your relationships. The second challenge is to respect those boundaries and insist others do as well.
On this episode we talk all about boundaries. Boundaries are limits. They are the fences we put up to keep ourselves emotionally safe in relationships. We need them when our boss emails at 8 pm at night expecting a response. We need them when someone says something that makes us uncomfortable. We need them when we say we aren't eating chocolate and our BFF shows up with our favourite chocolate bar.
Are you saying yes when you mean yes?
Are you saying no when you mean no?
If you are you probably have good boundaries in place. One of the biggest challenges women face in boundaries is expecting other people to respect our boundaries. It starts with us. We have to respect our boundaries first!
Here are just some of the big lessons we share in this episode:
1. Don’t expect other people to know your boundaries. You have to verbalize them. (He's not a mind reader!)
2. Stop spending time with people who don’t respect your boundaries. And tell them why you aren't spending time with them.
3. Practice setting boundaries - with a friend if needed.
4. Learn to be OK with disappointing people. When you set boundaries you will disappoint people. Remember: The only people who get upset when you set boundaries are the people who benefited from you having none.
5. Set them early or set them as soon as you become aware you need one.It is never too late to set boundaries in a relationship.
6. Reframe boundaries - see them as self-respect, protecting your well-being and joy so you can be present to what is really important.
This episode is a rich discussion on the lessons we have learned in our life and leadership around boundaries. If you have struggled to set boundaries or felt like you didn't get the respect you wanted you will find this episode helpful in reframing boundaries.